Even without fangs, ‘Twilight’ movie sucks
I’m sad to report that even with low expectations for Twilight, I was really disappointed by the movie. First of all, the casting was all wrong. The only characters who came close to what I’d imagined were Billy, Mike, Jessica, Alice, and Esme. Kristen Stewart as Bella was pretty but incredibly awkward. Not awkward in a Michael Cera (of Arrested Development and Juno fame) sort of way, but in a painful to watch sort of way. The movie followed the book very closely, which I usually appreciate. Twilight, however, would have benefitted from some changes. Reading Meyer’s often ridiculous dialogue wasn’t nearly as bad as hearing it on screen and then watching Kirsten Stewart’s deadpan face.
Edward was appropriately good looking (though the Edward in my head had more muscles, grace, and better posture), but boring. So boring that I didn’t even realize until reading about the movie that he’s the same actor (Robert Pattinson) who played Cedric Diggory in Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. I love Cedric. Edward was forgettable. And that hair… Edward’s wild rat nest hardly screams “class” or “style”.
There was also no chemistry between Edward and Bella, just a lot of intense stares and stutters.
The movie was creepy, but not in the way we would hope – only in Bella’s lack of reaction when Edward tells her he’s been sneaking into her bedroom for the past couple of months to watch her sleep. It makes a me a little sick to my stomach thinking of all those tween and teen girls out there swooning over Edward’s possessive, stalkerish behavior.
I suppose I still enjoyed the movie, but I can’t imagine how anyone who hasn’t read the book would. The movie assumed too much of its audience, and even having read the books, I thought it was choppy, bits and pieces strung together.
The special effects were also sorely lacking. Edward scampering up and down trees looked absurd, and the blurry movements of the vampires – while meant to convey their inhuman speed – were just cheesy.
Well, it’s clear how I feel. What did you think? Were the characters as you imagined them? Did it live up to the book, and the hype?